reflection....

I'm going to digress away from the "12 days after Christmas" for just a day to re-publish something I wrote about a year ago.  I guess I think this idea is important enough to repeat....the same thing happened to me again at the end of 2014...I hope you take it to heart.

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When Michael and I moved to South Carolina, we decided we would start writing a yearly missive to go in our Christmas cards. I was unwilling to add to the pre-Christmas stress, so I agreed to it only if we could send it out AFTER the holiday…and so it began. I struggled a lot with writing the missive for 2013. The way I write it is to re-read all of my letters for the year. So, I read and read this year and basically, Michael golfs and paints, and I sew and cook and knit….pretty boring, right? I mean, we think we have a FABULOUS life, but writing about those hobbies just doesn’t cut it. I thought that for 2014, at the end of every month I should do the write up, and then by Christmas I would be all done. But I decided that that wasn’t a good way to go about it. Re-reading all of the letters for 2013 gave me a chance to remember things I had forgotten and to reflect on things we had done. As one of my friend recently said ‘very few people take the time to reflect on their lives’ and I agree…we’re so busy living them that we don’t take the time to figure out if this is what we really want to be doing. The leader of my Thursday quilt group does a really cool thing every January. She hands out pieces of paper for all of the quilters to write down something they want to accomplish during the new year. Then you fold the paper and put your name on the outside. She collects them, and hands them back to you a year later. The point is not to chastise or embarrass anyone, since no one sees the paper you write on except you…but it really points up the fact that something you really wanted to accomplish a year ago…you either did…or didn’t. I remember when I was in Connecticut and working at Travelers, there was a man in a department peripherally related to mine, and we had the same birthday. We would go out to lunch on that day every year…that was pretty much the only time we saw one another. It was interesting to see if we were complaining about the same things a year later, or how our lives had changed. It was a good marker to see if we were progressing towards whatever it was we thought was important. I feel like those missives have done that for me. As much as we love our lives here, and enjoy the freedom to do whatever we want when we get up in the morning…I don’t want all of the days to slip by, only to look back and say ‘how did I get here…and is this where I wanted to be 1 year ago, or 5 years ago, or even 10’. I think this is why people make resolutions….maybe they should be called goals instead, but whatever you call them, you’re talking to yourself to change your life in some way. Most of my friends know I make resolutions every year…and am very good about keeping them. The difference is…I only make 1 or 2 resolutions and I never resolve to lose weight or exercise (although I definitely should J). Instead, I spend a lot of time thinking about what I really want to change over the next year…and I make my goals easily achievable, instead of jumping to a ‘pie in the sky would this be great…but I know I’ll never keep it up’ thing. Anyway….just my random thoughts about things…and I thought I’d post the missive…in case you didn’t see it in a belated Christmas card….

 

2014 missive - Hello to all of our friends…here it is, our annual POST holiday missive….

It really doesn’t matter what we did in January, because the most memorable thing was also the saddest.  Our good friend Jimmy, who we met “under the tent” in February of 2006, died from a brain tumor.  No one could have put up a better fight than Jimmy did against his horrible diagnosis and he retained his humor and good nature and fight until the end…but the end of January also saw the end of Jimmy’s all too brief life.  To remember Jimmy I only have to look around my house and see the many projects he completed for us….he was a good and funny friend and we will miss him forever.

2014 seemed to be “the year of the purge” and we started in earnest in February, cleaning out the laundry room, and kitchen cupboards.  Later in the year we got rid of a ton of stuff from the garage.  We celebrated Michael’s birthday in style with a bunch of neighbors and his traditional chocolate layer cake.  I also made apple crisp for the (crazy!) non-chocolate lovers in the group J.  Michael and I had talked on and off about setting up a scholarship at my old high school and at the end of the month we finally had the pleasure of setting up the Devokaitis Music Scholarship in honor of our parents.

March was all about travel….in the early part of the month I had a wonderful visit in Connecticut with the Fiber Floozies and at the end of the month, Michael took off for Myrtle Beach with his golfing buddies.

The beginning of April heralded warmer weather in South Carolina and we had our first breakfast for the year out on the deck.  Our iris’s exploded this month in our front garden, with 50 – 60 blooms at once. 

Michael and I joined a bocce league in May and played every Monday evening for 2 months.  But the big news… the best thing that happened in May…the dream of a quilter’s lifetime, I bought a long arm machine (subsequently named Miss Scarlet).  The worst thing that happened in May…I bought a long arm machine!  After months and months of problems and replacements of parts, it finally started working in late August and I completed many charity quilts.

In the spirit of last year, we once again had a vacation in June.  Michael & I packed up the car and headed off on a road trip…first stop, the BOTANICAL GARDENS in Richmond….beautiful, with an added bonus of a butterfly exhibit.  Then it was on to Washington, DC for a couple of days.  We saw the Lincoln monument, the WWII monument and the Korean memorial, which was absolutely incredible.  Then it was off to Arlington, and along with President & Mrs. Kennedy’s family gravesite, we saw the changing of the guard at the tomb of the Unknown Soldier.  The second day was spent visiting several of the Smithsonian Museums, of particular interest to me were Julia Child’s kitchen and the ruby slippers from THE WIZARD OF OZ.  The next stop was Marc & Kate’s house.  We haven’t visited since they moved to Ithaca and it was wonderful to see everything.  We toured Cornell (where Marc works), the guys got to golf together, and we also got to see Marc play with his band.  Then it was on to Canada and Niagara Falls.  Michael planned this entire vacation with no help from me and it was spectacular…I loved everything we did.  From the beginning, he told me we would be going to a secret place after Niagara.  He wouldn’t tell me anything about it.  When we were at dinner the night before we were leaving Canada, he started giving me hints.  When I finally figured out he was taking me to my childhood home…I burst into tears.  I haven’t been back in almost 40 years and it was very emotional.  The first day we saw both homes I lived in, my high school and various other landmarks.  He told me he didn’t plan anything for our second day there, and I immediately said I wanted to go to the Carnegie Science Center.  We spent the day there and it was fabulous…and in the evening we went to a Pirates game at the new stadium…where our seats were so close I could almost touch the players.  It was a wonderful vacation and I am very lucky to have a husband who planned the whole trip!

In July I learned to SKYPE J.  Instead of weekly phone calls with friends in Connecticut, I have now joined the 21st century and we SKYPE.  It was wonderful….once I got over how old I looked!  Speaking of how old, I had one of those BIG, BAD birthdays in July…we celebrated with friends as I turned 60.  The highlight of July was BG’s unexpected visit around the middle of the month.  We had a wonderful, but all-too-short visit before I had to drive her to Virginia to meet up with her ride home.

The beginning of August saw me visiting my friend Ginny in Virginia.  And once again, even though I was there for DAYS….we never ran out of things to talk about J.  I got back into the canning mode with tomatoes in August.  I had a bunch of roma tomatoes, and my friend Loree brought me a peck of her garden tomatoes.  We got them all processed into sauce, and then she showed me how to pressure can them.  Michael loved eating the results!  I also did 2 demos in August at our SCCL cooking club.  Michael helped me to make 70 portions of my peach cobbler on 2 separate Sundays, and on the following Mondays I did a demo on how to make it.  Many people told me how good it was, and one woman indicated that she would never peel her peaches again (since I didn’t, and she couldn’t tell the difference).

September had 2 wonderful things going for it….I went on retreat with my other Fiber Floozie friends, and I met with our CPA and QUILT DEVO LLC, my quilting business, was born.  My honey was cast in the Fort Mill production of WAIT UNTIL DARK, which opened in November to rave reviews.

My old boss and good friend Laure finally got to visit us in October.  I think she loved everything about SCCL and maybe she’ll consider living here one day.  Michael gave her a demo/lesson on alcohol inks and she was an immediate fan!  For Michael, much of October was spent at rehearsal….5 nights a week from 7 until 10 PM.  He loves doing a play, but rehearsing that often gets tiring very quickly.

November brought a bad health scare for one of Michael’s golfing buddies, and I decided to make a golf themed quilt for him to use during his recovery.  At the end of the month, we had the cast party for WAIT UNTIL DARK, and as always, had a really good time celebrating with the cast and crew.

December was again an orgy of candy making and cookie baking, which I could never get all done without my honey bagging and packaging up everything I make.  A lot of the month was also spent on a surprise Christmas gift of a new quilt for Michael.

Once again, 2014 was a year filled with golfing and theatre (both community and professional) and new recipes, quilting  and lots of visits and dinners with friends.  We are glad to still be (relatively) healthy and happy and we’re definitely looking forward to what 2015 brings.  We still feel so fortunate to be living here and we try to be grateful every day for all of the wonderful things that have happened over this past year.

If you would like to keep in touch with us through email, you may use: MPDEVO@comporium.net (for Michael) and dreamsoaps@aol.com (for Deb).  If you’re going to be anywhere in the area we’d love to see you; our house has guest accommodations available on a first come, first served basis!